IDENTITY: We've All Got One, Right?

By Bizzie Gold

I’ll spare you the long-winded, in-depth and no-doubt nerdy version of my Chakra system lectures for the purpose of this email and skip to the goods. (If you want to dig deeper in Chakra Diagnostic work and personal development, I’d suggest the Buti RYT program or a BREAK Method Workshop

The Chakras are REAL. Psychologist and researcher Dr. Hiroshi Motoyama proved their existence with an electromagnetic measurement tool in a series of clinical studies. What is a Chakra? In the simplest of terms it is a vortex of spinning energy or a collecting pool of energy. These vortices, of which there are 7 primary, run from your coccyx to the crown of your head. The science of the Chakra system is NOT religious and is deeply rooted in the practice of yoga.

Chakras develop or concentrate their energy in a specific vortex in phases of 7 years. The root chakra or Muladhara Chakra presides over the person from ages 0-7. During this time, as human beings, we only care about our basic needs being met, to be kept safe, fed and shown love. Unfortunately, many people experience unrest at home via parental disagreements, inconsistent emotional responses, overly harsh punishments of young children and of course more severe childhood scars like addiction and abuse. When we begin life with a disrupted foundation by way of root chakra imbalance, it becomes exceptionally challenging to securely develop your identity in the time of the sacral Chakra Svadhistana, ages 8-15.

There are variety of ways that we lose touch with our instinctive or TRUE identity:

1) root chakra primary imbalance (i.e. some type of trauma or fear disrupted your ability to have basic needs being met and therefore spending time poking around in the vulnerable abyss of forming your TRUE identity becomes unsafe.

2) your parents tried TOO hard to give you the perfect life. They shielded you from everything. Did everything for you and never forced you to go it alone and prove to yourself that you have the ability to be independent and make good decisions. Like a diamond that forms from a coal that has been intensely impact in all directions, your parents or caregivers, must not only allow you to make your own mistakes and learn from them but also create a system by which you are properly rewarded for excellence and reprimanded for failure or lack of effort. Parents that are overly careful not to “make their child feed bad,” often cause their child to never truly form a secure identity. It is through the impacts or boundaries created by the people around us that we discover WHO we are and what we AGREE and DISAGREE with.

3) we remember knowing EXACTLY what we wanted to do. Race car driver. Vet. Firefighter. You may have had some lofty goal you wanted to achieve with your life. Now, maybe the manifestation of that childhood perception of your purpose missed the mark slightly BUT there are important takeaways in the assessment of that 9 year oldIDENTITY. Sadly, due to socialization and parents infusing their Chakra imbalances onto us, we were likely made to feel that these goals, dreams or manifestations of identity were NOT GOOD ENOUGH or NOT REALISTIC. For many, this becomes that make or break moment where our parents decide to let us decide for ourselves and show loving support for excellence and criticism for failure OR push you throw away your dreams, DENY your true identity and turn into a version of what they want you to become. It is the FIRST time that we begin to feel phony, fraud and our creative centers (and often sexuality) come crashing down on us.

So, ask yourself - do you KNOW WHO YOU ARE or have you become a ROLE in your life: a “good” sister, a “good” wife, a caretaker, a doormat, a martyr, a referee - with little no true understanding of what your soul desires.
When you take on ROLES instead of discover your true identity, you often feel something is missing or struggle with the grass is greener complex. The truth is - the grass is greener - just not in the way that your emotional addiction is currently training you to think of it. “ Oh, if I just made more money.” “If I could just afford that purse.” ALL the IFs.

The only TRUE statement is - “IF only I committed to discovering my TRUE IDENTITY - then I’d be fulfilled and self-realized.”

The BREAK Method uses Directed Storytelling® to bypass the parts of the brain that cling to the emotionally-infused narrative that is your life story as you’re used to telling it or thinking about it. Especially if you’re an avid journaler, your life story suddenly takes on this larger than life role in your life and if I asked you to tell me your story 3 times, EVERY time would be different. Every time you’d jump back and forth in time and MOST IMPORTANTLY every time you get close to a memory that triggers an emotional response your brain tries to trick you into going around it, changing it or jumping to a different part of your chronology.

The parts of your story that OBJECTIVE-you and I need to see and understand are the parts of the story that aren’t romanticized. They’re not the pretty or necessarily clearly significant moments in your life. In my work, it’s become CLEAR as crystal, that in order to SHOW you the information you need to piece together your emotional addiction pattern and BREAK it forever, you need COLD, HARD, facts that come from your subconscious, instinctive brain. In this exercise, you are NOT to THINK you are to breath and write the first thing that comes to mind when you ask your SELF the question. If you catch yourself stopping to erase and re-write. DON’T. That’s your self-protection mechanism. It’s your brain trying to “protect” you from the truth. We always hear the truth shall set you free and this is certainly no exception.

Be sure to fill out the PDF workbook of Directed Storytelling® and watch the follow-up webinar provided to you for FREE in the previous link. During the IDENTITY Webinar, I will teach the first step to BREAKING FREE of emotional addiction. I was able to work with a few previous students LIVE on the webinar and many of their experiences resonated with the whole group. We often learn more about our journey (and its inevitable missteps) by baring witness to someone else's transformation. So, be sure to stay attentive and learn from their LIVE questions. Don't forget to complete your Directed Storytelling® workbook before watching the IDENTITY Webinar.